The traditional family is the model God designed to convey His ways, His authority, and His truth to children, but Satan knows this and that is why he is so determined to destroy, counterfeit, and pervert everything God has established. He was doing his best, but without Christ as the guiding force, our best is only the capacity to sin, due to our fallen nature. I harbored resentment against my father for a number of years, until I came to realize he had no framework or reference to emulate in being a father, because he himself never had a father to look up to. His own mother destroyed virtually every picture of him and threw away most his belongings, out of anger.

I then recalled my mom telling me stories of the horrible upbringing my father had to endure, as the result of his parents getting a divorce. This memory stirred up a lot of deep-rooted emotions I had previously suppressed. As a young child, I can remember going to the base with my mom and having her point to which man was my father. Growing up in a military family, my dad was gone quite often, so the family dynamic was very skewed and the reintegration process became more difficult each time. With this as the starting point, parents must then teach the consequences behind action, while also demonstrating the forgiving, transforming, and empowering grace and mercy of Jesus Christ found in the gospel.Īs a parent myself, I have a much deeper appreciation for all my parents contributed to my upbringing. children will think about the consequences and implications of the things they say and do.” Ultimately, Tripp and Tripp show parents must first understand his or her role in the process of raising children, by teaching the truths behind formative discipline. Tripp and Tripp then suggest, “During times of corrective discipline, we must appeal to formative instruction that helps children understand all the issues of life from the perspective of God’s revelation, the Bible. When we can use incentives or punishments to get the behavior we want without God and His redemption, we are teaching our children that they can live in God’s world without Christ and be fine.” Instead, parents should teach children how the principle of sowing and reaping are both positive and negative (Galatians 6:7-8). Sadly, as Tripp and Tripp show, the world uses behaviorism as the answer and it “may be popular – it may even work, but it obscures the gospel. Thus, the major goal in any form of discipline must be to reach and impact the heart of the child. This profoundly shapes how we view consequences… Children must understand consequences as God designed them, not as the world teaches them.” This model provides considerable insight on the sowing and reaping principle of Scripture. Tripp and Tripp clarify, “Our central objective in instruction, discipline, and correction is heart change, not behavior change.

Satan has built his kingdom on two pillars: ignorance & error, so the job as parents is to remove ignorance and to correct error. Tripp and Tripp then illuminate, all children are born to worship the only question is what he or she will choose to worship: the created things or the Creator? The what of behavior are things that one does or says and the why of behavior is the motive.” The heart is essentially what makes the person who he or she is and the actions of the heart produce worship and emotions. Solomon demonstrates the importance of the heart in Proverbs 4:23, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” Tripp and Tripp explain, “The heart is the seat of motivation, so the when of behavior is the circumstance for the behavior. As parents, it can become second nature to focus on the behavior, which requires correction, instead of on the heart issues that are the true source of bad behavior. Getting away from corrective behavior to the heart of the matter is vital in the formative discipline process presented by Tripp and Tripp. Tedd and Margy Tripp have identified the importance of instructing a child, not only to inform his or her mind, but also to impress God’s truth and wisdom upon the heart.

Instructing a childs heart